Tales of a New Mom -aka- The Mama Bat

      Whoever said being a stay at home mom is a full time job, is SO correct.       You are on 24-7 and though people always say, "Take a break!"        or tell you to get some rest, it's darn near impossible to do! I'd do anything for this face!      Yesterday was a particularly difficult day for Draygen. 6 months old, I am learning has its ups and downs. The Ups: New discoveries, better coordination, eating, sitting up, more laughing and talking to name a few. Downs: Teething, higher sensitivity to shots, fighting sleep, and overall just being a big cranky butt!  So yesterday I was at the hospital for an appointment for my mom. Draygen and I had a long wait and he began to grow weary and cranky. He is usually pretty laid back and well behaved out in public and spends a lot of time just being chill or sleeping in the stroller. Even though I let him get out and such, nothing was calming him or maki...

This is me and my emotions right now about this subject and as  silly or illogical as it may sound to anyone else.  I am hurt by other people and by my baby. First of all, I am not stupid. I realize my 5 month old son does not have the decision making skills in his brain to purposely seek out to hurt, manipulate or play favorites. I know this, I do.  I'm just having a really hard time lately with the fact that Draygen's new ability has been displayed upon everyone but me. In other words, he has learned to reach out to people that he wants, and he doesn't do that for me at all. He puts his arms out and get's excited when he sees his aunt and his daddy, and leans toward Grandma. I admit it's jealousy on my part...considering I'm the one who takes care of him the majority of the day and gets up with him at night. I feel like maybe I need to go away on my own for hours just to see if he likes me when I get back!

           My husband suggested that I blog or vlog about being honest with your spouse about what you need when it comes to raising your child. So did both. ( See vlog here ). Even though I have the majority of the time at home with our son, my husband and I are a team, working together to care for our little boy. I am with him all day until my husband gets home from work, then its daddy time. Ugo has a stressful job working with kids, so I totally understand his need to detox when he gets home. I try my best to give him his space and time alone for a little while before dropping baby in his lap but sometimes I'm just so tired and grateful that he's home that daddy doesn't always get his down time. On the other side of the coin, I'm not only with Draygen all day, but up with him at night as well. So I don't get a whole lot of down time myself.      The great thing about our marriage is that we talk. We communicate our needs to one ano...

     So...I haven't been keeping up with this blog lately because this Mamma Bat is tired! Baby boy has decided to change his sleep schedule, despite me getting him into a good bed time routine. Now he wakes up several times a night, very hungry, (growth spurt again I'm assuming) and does not want to go back to sleep in his bed. He wants to be held. He will stay asleep when held. Which is great, except for the fact that this tired body that is in much need of a professional full body massage, hurts. I can hold him for only so long before I lose feeling in my hands and arms. I have many nights of stiff neck and aching back, the battle wounds of motherhood.      Yesterday was a particularly trying day. I was very sleep deprived and on the verge of tears as I held my son, attempting to feed him without giving him a face full of formula, as my husband went off to work. Draygen did not want to return to sleepy land (mom did!). So I filled myself with coffee an...

By my last post, you may be thinking, "Gee does she enjoy being a mom at all?!" Yes, I do. There are so many good things that tip the scales for me when I'm feeling down and tired. I can't resist that little face, those cheeks, the little "o" shape he makes with his lips, those eyes, and that smile that melts my heart! Not to mention the little giggle and leg kicks. It's also so fun to watch Draygen discovering and learning. He's just now started grabbing things and holding onto them, (sometimes my hair, ouch!) and it's exciting to see him engaged in things.  It amazes me to watch him being in awe of the world around him. About ready to smile We take the bus a lot, and it used to be that the bus ride would put him to sleep and he'd sleep most of the time we are out, but the past few weeks he's been really awake and aware and he get's this funny wide eyed look like ''What's going on?!" Just seeing him laugh a...

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I suppose any new mom might say, "I love being a mom, I really do, I love my baby so much, but I need a break from him/her?!" or "I love being a mom but I'm so tired and frustrated!" or...any other number of phrases triggered by sleep deprivation and emotions. In this post I'm gonna get down to the nitty gritty, the truth, those thoughts and feelings that I have that aren't so great, that aren't so nice about motherhood. Maybe you've had them too but were just waiting to see if anyone else felt them before you admitted them out loud to yourself? Or maybe you are a perfect new mom who has never felt these things at all, but I highly doubt you being human if you don't. Frustrations Baby napping peacefully in his bed in the day but not at night Having to be the only one who gets up with baby at night Watching others sleeping while I'm up with baby  Others taking over when I don't need help and not available when I do! Baby se...