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Where I'm At Now






     I'm starting this blog on the couch (on my phone's note app, later typed up via laptop), while my two month old son is at the end of the couch sleeping on his little pillow, while my husband is snoring away in the bedroom. My sleep schedule is all kinds of messed up (Ha! What sleep?!) and those pounds I was so longing to shed after the baby was born are still here, a cushion for baby and what my husband affectionately calls, "Marshmellowy."
      It wasn't supposed to be like this. I was supposed to be walking with the stroller, smiling away and working out at the apartment gym while baby snoozed away in the stroller. But this has not happened. Why? Because any mom will tell you her number one answer: "I'm too tired." We all have the best intentions for ourselves to get back in shape and gain our confidence back while enjoying our new baby but instead this becomes an unrealistic dream wrapped up in a child who is in constant need of you for all it's feeding, bathroom and entertainment needs. But we love it too and as I hold my little beastie in my arms at night, feeding him, half asleep myself, I think, "How on earth did I get here? How did this happen to me of all people?"(More on that later). I think of how blessed I am to have such a healthy baby at my age, what he will be like in a year or two when he's actually calling me mommy (that'll be surreal!) and I'm making him PB&J sandwiches. I yawn and dream on of these things and of getting rid of my Stay Puff Marshmallow body.

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